...like my exams for tomorrow. And my literally bleeding ear. And the fact that I, well, ......
(oh, ellipsis)
But instead, I worry about this:
....
To better explain, expound, elaborate, I'll write a few fictional paragraphs. And yes, you can consider this a short story. But no, the events are not what you call factual. Ask the feeling for the gist, why don't ya.
Oh btw, the main character is not ME. The main character might even be a SHE or a HE-SHE.
She sits in the chair, hating the world for what it couldn't do for her. That is, make her feel loved. Useful. Unlike a dust bunny under an eon-old bed. She read a passage - the one from life. The one that no one frequently reads. The one that she will only choose to love. And while reading this passage, she pondered and thought.
She's reclusive, truth be told. And sometimes the recluse makes her so isolated from time and its pace. Yes, her pace is slower than time. Yes, her pace is not moving at all. Just steady. Just slowly trying, hoping to make the world turn back its axis. And undo her past mistakes. Un-hate the people that she hates and has hated. But she's smart enough to know that it will never happen.
This makes her angry, this makes her hate the world more. But out of all the darkness, the devils and the diabolical, she chooses to hate another girl. This girl is a girl who, normally, possesses higher sense. Knowledge. But is, like everyone else, flawed. So why did she hate her so much? Because this girl's ability to reason - rationality and superiority - intimidates her? Perhaps. Nonetheless, we may never know. Or maybe because she is insecure of the attention that this girl stirs? She is, after all, void of understanding herself. She believes this girl desires power. Grandeur - she even glanced a meaningful glance at her friend when the Girl She Hates admitted honestly that she desired power. But who does not?
Miss Emo believes she does not.
That was two days ago. Here's RIGHT now:
Is Miss Emo honest enough to admit that she is blind? That she is irrational? That she should not, by any means, try to mingle, trample, get into other people's lives because she per se cannot control her own? Is it obvious to Miss Emo that she hates the world mainly because she hates who she is? That she wants to change it badly but she subconsciously refuses to want change - because she is reclusive, abandoned, psychologically imbalanced and broken? Does she want war with the Girl She Hates? Does she even KNOW the Girl She Hates?
So many questions, so little of a brain to answer them.
Miss Emo believes that the Girl She Hates should die tonight. In fact, she wants to be the one to be the bringer of the death. She hates the Girl She Hates. Ever since last year. Ever since two years ago. Why? Because the Girl She Hates has a personality that is different from hers. A personality that is rarely found in the hallways of the school. The Girl She Hates is different. The Girl She Hates is unique. So is Miss Emo. Is that why they clash? Miss Emo's DISABILITY to comprehend that not all things can go her way and the Girl's eccentric, loud nature? Truly, does Miss Emo have the right to ignite a war because she hates a person's attitude, characteristics, personality? No. But she does have the right to hate the Girl She Hates.
Does Miss Emo have the right to brag and bitch?
No.
Does Miss Emo have the right to make it look like the Girl She Hates is the bearer of the torch to blame out of all this? No. But whatever this rift is, 50% of the problem lies in Miss Emo. And the rest lies in the Girl She Hates.
But if you ask me, the simple - biased - narrator, I say, blame 99% on Miss Emo. She started it all in the first place, right? She couldn't bear the burden no more. She couldn't pour all her hatred into the world. She had to pour it into the girl.
She still sits on her chair, teeth clenched, fists tightened into a ball of rushing blood, eyes forcefully vanished, heart seething. She hates the Girl She Hates. She hates her, she wants to kill her. She can't take it anymore.
She raises her clenched fists, ready to aim.
Aim where? At who?
Better watch out, Miss Emo. She has forgotten who the Girl She Hates is. And how this Girl plays her game. Don't raise fists, Miss Emo.
The Girl already pulled the silver trigger.
Where does the bullet aim?
At who?
(oh, ellipsis)
But instead, I worry about this:
....
To better explain, expound, elaborate, I'll write a few fictional paragraphs. And yes, you can consider this a short story. But no, the events are not what you call factual. Ask the feeling for the gist, why don't ya.
Oh btw, the main character is not ME. The main character might even be a SHE or a HE-SHE.
She sits in the chair, hating the world for what it couldn't do for her. That is, make her feel loved. Useful. Unlike a dust bunny under an eon-old bed. She read a passage - the one from life. The one that no one frequently reads. The one that she will only choose to love. And while reading this passage, she pondered and thought.
She's reclusive, truth be told. And sometimes the recluse makes her so isolated from time and its pace. Yes, her pace is slower than time. Yes, her pace is not moving at all. Just steady. Just slowly trying, hoping to make the world turn back its axis. And undo her past mistakes. Un-hate the people that she hates and has hated. But she's smart enough to know that it will never happen.
This makes her angry, this makes her hate the world more. But out of all the darkness, the devils and the diabolical, she chooses to hate another girl. This girl is a girl who, normally, possesses higher sense. Knowledge. But is, like everyone else, flawed. So why did she hate her so much? Because this girl's ability to reason - rationality and superiority - intimidates her? Perhaps. Nonetheless, we may never know. Or maybe because she is insecure of the attention that this girl stirs? She is, after all, void of understanding herself. She believes this girl desires power. Grandeur - she even glanced a meaningful glance at her friend when the Girl She Hates admitted honestly that she desired power. But who does not?
Miss Emo believes she does not.
That was two days ago. Here's RIGHT now:
Is Miss Emo honest enough to admit that she is blind? That she is irrational? That she should not, by any means, try to mingle, trample, get into other people's lives because she per se cannot control her own? Is it obvious to Miss Emo that she hates the world mainly because she hates who she is? That she wants to change it badly but she subconsciously refuses to want change - because she is reclusive, abandoned, psychologically imbalanced and broken? Does she want war with the Girl She Hates? Does she even KNOW the Girl She Hates?
So many questions, so little of a brain to answer them.
Miss Emo believes that the Girl She Hates should die tonight. In fact, she wants to be the one to be the bringer of the death. She hates the Girl She Hates. Ever since last year. Ever since two years ago. Why? Because the Girl She Hates has a personality that is different from hers. A personality that is rarely found in the hallways of the school. The Girl She Hates is different. The Girl She Hates is unique. So is Miss Emo. Is that why they clash? Miss Emo's DISABILITY to comprehend that not all things can go her way and the Girl's eccentric, loud nature? Truly, does Miss Emo have the right to ignite a war because she hates a person's attitude, characteristics, personality? No. But she does have the right to hate the Girl She Hates.
Does Miss Emo have the right to brag and bitch?
No.
Does Miss Emo have the right to make it look like the Girl She Hates is the bearer of the torch to blame out of all this? No. But whatever this rift is, 50% of the problem lies in Miss Emo. And the rest lies in the Girl She Hates.
But if you ask me, the simple - biased - narrator, I say, blame 99% on Miss Emo. She started it all in the first place, right? She couldn't bear the burden no more. She couldn't pour all her hatred into the world. She had to pour it into the girl.
She still sits on her chair, teeth clenched, fists tightened into a ball of rushing blood, eyes forcefully vanished, heart seething. She hates the Girl She Hates. She hates her, she wants to kill her. She can't take it anymore.
She raises her clenched fists, ready to aim.
Aim where? At who?
Better watch out, Miss Emo. She has forgotten who the Girl She Hates is. And how this Girl plays her game. Don't raise fists, Miss Emo.
The Girl already pulled the silver trigger.
Where does the bullet aim?
At who?
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